I've read a lot of articles about the unpleasant ideas about being forced to disclose stress details for your t, although I am hoping this isn't absolutely ridiculous. I am coping with almost the opposite.
I've many 'problems' that I am conscious of from an emotionally/verbally abusive stepfather to an adult that I trusted like a maternal figure that later revealed she'd other tips for your connection in high-school... Then what's daily becoming more of a certainty that I've repressed very early abuse (I've always had terrors but am not hearing his and my speech in my head and it isnot satisfying change of words)... I've NEVER told information on any one of this stuff. I have mentioned to 2 people who "something" occurred with this particular person I trusted which was the level. I am plagued short video within my mind of the ones I recall, by photographs and now these comments of what I suspect.
I I feel held back from talking also have found that I can't tell him SOMETHING if he does not ask and am dealing with at. I've told him this and he is great at trying to ask me questions. The issue is, I also can not tell him what to ask. I know it may seem completely crazy, but it is like I am prohibited to simply easily tell things but I'm permitted to answer honestly. He's gone back and forth about 'processing' trauma after which I think I am so quiet about things going on that he does not think they starts to think we must go another direction and are. I get angry after I hear him discuss not addressing the injury specifically and obtain extremely depressed and wish to stop hope about actually getting relief. It's like I UNDERSTAND I have to obtain these details out but I can't tell him that. I believe he is also concerned I cannot manage dealing with the injury immediately as a result of my anxiety attacks, but I really donot know how to transform any of this. He covers trauma as possible and attempting to take action with as small depth and that I have read about all these new methods to deal with PTSD without detailed handling, but I'd like it so bad.
Does this seem sensible to ANYONE? I understand I'd be REMARKABLY embaressed to convey the items that I hope it isn't anything ill making me want and I'd need to to... But I am worried we shall spend years since he thinks I'm scared, tiptoeing across the details and that I am seriously wanting to spill the beans. I hope I can tell him this, but it is not allowed.